Birthday

I get to share my birthday with some pretty kickass people. Billie Holiday, post-modernist Donald Barthelme, Romantic poet William Wordsworth, Will Keith Kellogg (who was a trusting enough capitalist that he let Mr. Post steal his recipe before patenting it himself), Ravi Shankar, Francis Ford Coppola, Janis Ian . . . hell, even James Garner is pretty cool. Before some late-career features that proved a little light, he was the badass gambler I got my middle name from (Bret Maverick); not a bad compendium of folks at all. Definitely enough to overshadow John Hall's contribution to the world.

If it wasn't completely obvious, I love music, and so I got to thinking today about The Beatles' song "Birthday" and its strengths and weaknesses. Its strengths are all obvious. It has a great guitar riff and some shredding vocals. Sir Paul gives it a real workout. Its weaknesses all stem from it being a birthday song.

Let's start at the beginning (a very good place to start). The joy of birthdays is their exclusivity; it is the one holiday of the year that is meant to celebrate you -- your own special day. The openings lines of "Birthday" are "you say it's your birthday. / Well, it's my birthday too, yeah." No one wants to hear that on their birthday. Who is going to come to your birthday party if they have the option of punch and cake with your parents or jammin' to the Venus and Mars rock show in London? Your own siblings would sneak out to go to Paul's party. I mean, maybe Matthew and Gunnar Nelson love this song, but unless you're a twin, sharing your birthday sounds like a nightmare.

Then you get a verse where Paul wants you to dance and take a ch-ch-ch-chance. That's great. I love to dance. But then at the end of the verse, Paul gives this gut-wrenching scream where he sounds like a mad scientist caught in a bear trap. It's a little scary. Bill Nye can come to my party, but Gargamel can stay home.

Still, Ringo keeps the beat rockin'. And, if today is your birthday, I'm glad it's your birthday. Happy birthday to you.